Seriously? This is not a lame attempt to pander to you via ham-fisted teen lingo throwdown. (That's what we usually do, it's just not what we're doing right now.) This is an earnest, mature, sober, adult expression of enthusiasm of the unrestrainable variety: ZOMG we got OtB!!!!!!!!!
On the Boards presents shows that "light up parts of your brain you forgot were there"
(David Schmader, the Stranger)
If you've never heard of On the Boards there's a reason. You're not cool enough. Just kidding sorta. You're totally cool. Your mom told me.
Okay, I'm sorry. It's the end of the day. Describe the venue:
In the valley between the verdant, blooming fields of dance, theatre, music, and film, there is a fecund marsh where art forms mingle and merge and cross-polinate. It grows impossibly riveting 7-hour-long staged readings of classic American literature and singers singing songs while hanging upside-down and sword-wielding Italian dancers covered in paint and art-history lectures disguised as dinner. It is On the Boards.
Hungry seekers of artistic risk, be glad. This is your garden.